Mothers
I have two Mothers,
Rose and Pat are their names,
Yet I love them both,
And hate them just the same.
One gave me life,
While the other dragged me up,
Such pain I suffered at their hands,
Such a terrible, bitter cup,
You gave me life then threw me away like rubbish,
Didn't want me any more, need me, love me,
a mouldy pudding in your dish.
So the other came along,
Married to my Dad,
But you are both sisters,
You have no morals, or are you both mad!
You share your children, your men, your razor tongues,
You cut each others hearts until there is nothing
left,
Always you try to hurt and cut,
Trying to be the best,
You didn't think what you did to us,
The children that you bore,
You certainly had enough of us,
But what were so many children for?
Rose you were the one that left me there alone,
Pat was the one, who crushed me through pain,
When all I wanted was you and a happy home,
Innocence lost, taken and stolen away,
Step-siblings, half-siblings, and cousins we all
became,
So messed up we never could explain,
I would have given you anything,
If only you had loved me, cared for me,
I would have made you a necklace of my skin,
But neither of you did.
Rose was gone, then came back,
Then left me alone again,
Left me with hate and confusion,
Back you came and added to my pain.
For one year I was with you,
I lived through hell for you,
While your husband beat me black and blue,
Your son doing things to me,
That a child and brother should never do,
I was still a baby then, only seven,
I didn't understand,
I thought you loved me and this was heaven,
But hell is what it became.
When the year was over you threw me away again,
Sent me back without a goodbye,
You didn't care, didn't see, my pain.
Back to her I had to go,
With hatred in my eyes,
For both of you sisters,
You are sisters that I despise.
She who stood so tall and grim,
Bearing down my soul,
And then there was him,
Her son, my step-brother, my cousin,
A freaky, dark, and evil soul,
Treated like nothing, no-one, just a thing,
Taker of childhood hopes, dream and fears,
To turn them into objects,
That only knew the sound of tears.
Abuse, neglect, hatred, pain,
To be beaten by you,
And have him do it again,
The first when I was only five,
Before Rose took me back,
In happiness I went with her,
When I still had a heart to pack,
Nothing left when you had finished,
The life you made me lead,
The pair of you my heart diminished,
A festering broken seed.
What did I ever do to you, except be born,
It’s not like I had a choice in that,
So why were you both so blind?
To the hate, fear and guilt that my soul sat.
Oh I need a Mother,
But a Mother I am now,
My children I love with all my heart,
I'll be their Mother, some-how,
I'll teach them compassion, happiness, and love,
I'll show them how I love them,
The beauty in the stars above.
For they say Mothers are special,
One and only Mother,
Show her that you care, are there,
Let her share your fears,
You only have one Mother,
So love yours, and rejoice,
Be happy that she loves you,
For that is her choice,
Love her; she is your Mother,
And be thankful knowing,
That life didn't give you another
